Deborah Melkin is hosting the community T-SQL Tuesday #184 carnival of blog posts. Her topic is one that is near and dear to her – and also near and dear to us here at Straight Path – Mentoring and Sponsorships. I am really looking forward to reading all of the posts this topic generates.
Deb suggested a few questions to prime the pump for a post – I think I’ll steal a few of those as inspiration. She also has a fantastic idea – if you are looking to mentor someone or be mentored by someone – she invites you to mention that or even visit her post and comment if you don’t blog. I encourage you to do that! (Her blog for your comment – let’s keep them all there!)
I will focus specifically on “Mentoring here” but I think the answers I share work for either mentoring or sponsorship.
What Does Mentoring Mean To Me?
I would say that as we’ve built Straight Path from a “solopreneurship” SQL Server consultancy with just one SQL Server geek doing some side consulting (Hi!) to a 17 person thriving company doing SQL Server consulting and managed SQL Server services – one of the key ingredients in that growth has been mentoring. We have intentionally developed a “What is SQL Server? To DBA to Senior DBA” path here at Straight Path and we have several folks on that path right now. The Senior DBAs we bring in all enjoy teaching and mentoring to some degree. We get a chance to pour into each other’s careers and bring folks in from the ground up and watch them grow.
There are a few reasons for this – I’ll explain below. But first – I think it’s fair to say – mentoring to me means – I have a career. I have a company. I get the pleasure and blessing of seeing other folks’ knowledge increase and I get to watch the team here at Straight Path grow. I get to reflect back on the mentoring I received. Mentoring is life. In some manner of speaking – it’s that simple. I wrote a blog post ages ago called “You already influence people – Only choice is How“ (Clearly I needed a mentor in grammar, writing voice, and all back in 2015… I still do, I know.)
My Story –> Our Story
Below are some thoughts on mentoring I’ve had and witnessed, as well as some lessons to draw from this.
No Such Thing as Luck – a First Manager
Things came full circle when I hired my first DBA manager and mentor, Andy Kelly, in January. I wrote about him many years ago and his mentoring that frankly was necessary for this company to exist – and this blog to exist. Well, to not repeat this story again fully, he was my first manager when I was officially first a Jr. DBA some 25ish years ago. He expected me to get stuff done, but then he spent most of his time guiding me on what SQL Server was, what all the stuff we did as DBAs meant, the why, the how. His passion for giving back to the community and sharing his knowledge bled into me (I just wasn’t ready to wade out into the newsgroups yet 😉 )
George – A Great Manager
In my mid-full-time DBA career, I was a bit of an “easily put into martyr mode” DBA (I still suffer there a bit). George was an ex Oracle-DBA turned manager – and another fantastic manager. He sat me down one day and explained to me “You’re a good DBA (at least I hope I’m not adding that part with the passage of time 😉 ) but you don’t need to be a jerk (or more colorful word) all the time – I get it we’re busy, and folks don’t use us right, we don’t get brought to the table until its too late – but people respect you for your knowledge and we don’t need to always push back – save it for the times we need it.” He was right – and he often poured mentoring into me on not just the technical side (though he could never make me love Oracle RAC 😉 ) but also on the interpersonal side. I blogged about George nearly 16 years ago now here.
Straight Path
We are a mentoring team. We are a values first company. Inspired by books like The Ideal Team Player (FANTASTIC Book in the realm of this topic!) – we try and hire hungry, humble, smart folks. And as a team – we are all about mentoring. We pour into our support team. Seniors pour into new seniors. The team has no problem telling me when I’m wrong – or even reminding me that some of George’s lessons are still needed. So we share accidentally and through intentional mentor relationships here. Our organization structure demands it and our clients and team are better for it.
Every hire we have brought on has taught me something. So we mentor up and down. In fact, I would say that Jeff Iannucci and Sandra Delany really helped give life to our mentoring program, while our ops manager, Evan, really helped make it continue to happen.
Some Lessons to Pull From Those Examples
- Do it—don’t wait—don’t make it perfect, don’t make the time right. Start it. Learn as you go. And let the mentors and “mentees” help you improve it as you go.
- Codify it in your culture – No blame, no gatekeeping, no cliques – everyone teaches. Everyone learns.
- Teach it – Be intentional in how you do it, make time for it, teach it to your teams. Learn it.
- Be Humble – Not every idea is a great idea, but every idea generally should be heard – live that – demonstrate it – let really constructive ideas flow up the chain just as easily as “top down leadership” orgs push crap down. Listen, learn, change.
- Do it on their terms – Find what the folks you are mentoring are passionate about – see where the crossover is – get to know them, tailor what you deliver to them where they are – and where they want to go.
- Intentionality – This is one of my greatest weaknesses – I get ideas, I get distracted and crazy – hiring operationally minded folks and letting them make sure the programs start was so key to making them happen and continue.
- Be Honest – I have some of the worst memory of anyone I know – I don’t remember a whole lot of my childhood – barely remember any of it other than more the “textual stories I was told and can share” – I don’t have a lot of experiential memories – and have only recently started to slow down a bit and be more present – it’s a work and a change in my life that I still miss more than I follow. But I remember my talks with George. I remember George giving me serious conversations about my career at that company and in general. I remember him modeling the examples. I remember him caring to call out the bad. He didn’t hold back – even if it was uncomfortable. Honesty is key.
Mentoring is key. Mentoring is everything. And I really hope that Straight Path is on its way to being a “hundred year company” – and if it is – I think it is for these three reasons primarily:
- We live by our values and know who we are – we aren’t afraid to be relentlessly be who we are we are getting better and not trying to be who we aren’t.
- We hire folks who get the values and get along. (I’m telling you – go get The Ideal Team Player and read it RIGHT NOW.)
- We mentor, share, learn, and teach – with honesty and humility.
